One of the most frustrating things about living in a big city is the feeling that I can’t walk outside without being harassed on the street at least once a day. When I first started experiencing this I found it annoying, but as the years pass I become increasingly furious. Not a day goes by that I don’t experience one or more of the following: cat-calling, whistling, kissing noises, intensely seductive stares, or pointed glances up and down my body. Contrary to what many men think, this attention is not appreciated and not flattering, and I’m sure most women agree with me. This kind of attention is not like being given a complement …it’s not like being told, “you are beautiful.” It actually feels horrible; it makes me feel degraded and violated, but most of all, it makes me feel utterly powerless. I feel as if my body doesn’t belong to me, and this infuriates me more than anything I’ve ever experienced.
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Something that I find extremely tragic is that almost every one of us feels ashamed or unhappy about our bodies in some way. I have never known a girl who doesn’t have something about her body she’d like to change, and I’m sure most men feel the same way. At some point in our lives, if not for all of our lives, we are haunted by the parts of our bodies that we don’t like, whether it’s our legs, hips, ears, acne, hair, or even the way we smile or the way our face gets pink after exercising.
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Creativity is often a slippery, fickle friend. It seems to come and go as it pleases, and the harder I work to catch it and hold it, the more elusive it becomes. At times it’s shy and is scared away easily, and at other times it’s strong-willed and monopolizes my attention whenever it pleases, regardless of the time, and whether or not I have something to write on and must fervently start taking notes on napkins. Here is my list of advice on how to deal with working creatively:
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Something I’ve noticed recently is that we are very good at hiding our feelings from ourselves. Whenever we feel intense or troublesome feelings like fear, anxiety, or sadness, our minds often revert to using disguises and barriers against feeling those emotions. These self-defense mechanisms deflect attention from our feelings and turn our focus towards the external environment.
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The other night my boyfriend and I embarked on a cooking adventure. As typical New Yorkers in our twenties, we rarely use the kitchen for anything but baking, eating cereal, and storing leftovers. But this weekend he and I got excited to try something new—we took on a recipe for a rice and chicken dish to make burritos.
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